Confused

I didn’t write about it, but we hit a very big hurdle in November, over something that happened in October. And though he forgave me, I always thought it happened rather quickly because he seemed to have forgiven me, and was back to treating me like nothing happened within a week. We’ve had arguments between then and now, but nothing major. Except ’til right before I left for holidays.

He had been drinking, and it doesn’t matter what we argued about. But he started talking about how if two people aren’t compatible maybe they should just give up. We went to bed without really resolving things that night. He eventually said to me that he thinks we should keep trying… but the next day I wasn’t really convinced. It took me a while to get over it and think that we were going to be okay. The hardest part of it all was that it came out of no where. I wasn’t trying to argue with him at all, and it somehow turned into a critical argument.

Anyway, a week or two passed with no major events and then I left for my holiday. When I got back, he had been amazing… as per the last few posts. But this Friday, when I met him at the pub for a few drinks… I’m not quite sure what happened. Apart from him being drunk that is.

His friend had gone to the bathroom, and he started talking to me about random things.
Like, am I going to start spin class this week.
Yeah, me and what money?
He offers to pay for it.
That still doesn’t work. I don’t get home till 6 and I’m usually starving.
He says I shouldn’t eat before working out anyway.
True, but I’d rather not faint which I will if I work out and not eat. Especially since I’ll have to walk home after working out for over 75 minutes, not to mention I’ll be walking to the gym too. That’s an extra hour of exercise that he won’t be getting. Not to mention I do a hell of a lot more walking on a daily basis to and from the bus stop and during my lunch break at work since I don’t drive. Not to mention all the walking with heavy groceries I have to do because I don’t have a car.

That seemed to satisfy him. So he moved on to the fact that I always have to go to the bathroom before we leave any place. And it wasn’t a simple observation because I tried to explain to him that I just had a terribly small bladder and as an example: Everyday after work I make sure to go to the bathroom right before I leave the building and by the time I get off the bus, I have to make sure I speed walk to get home so I don’t piss my pants. But he wouldn’t let up. He was trying to pick a fight with me and I just really didn’t have the energy. So I said I would go and that I would just see him tomorrow, even though we had plans for him to stay at my place that night.

As I walked out of the pub, he followed me and after I said that I don’t even understand what I did in there that made him so angry and that it wasn’t fair. He brought it up. And just completely exploded at me. I don’t really want to elaborate on it anymore because… I just don’t. I can not make heads nor tails of what is going on inside his head. And even though he promised me that we would talk about things on Saturday. We didn’t. We had a nice date instead. But I’m still confused.

responses to “Confused” 3

  1. Very strange. Does he even remember what went on with you and what he said when he finally does sober up? Seems like his comments are very random and out of the blue. I hope things work out for you. You know Im always hoping for the best.

  2. His personality is not one to share, and I hate to say this, but you either accept him “as-is” or ask him to start opening up to you. It’s just a reality Reg. Also, you need “self-care” for yourself, and you shouldn’t be letting this situation stress you out too much. You’re still trying to figure out everything in your life — ya know what I mean? It’s not like you’re “married” girl. I mean, I’m not gonna lie, him bitching about your bladder is bullshit. He should feel bad for you. I’m also a bit curious as to why he’s trying to dictate to you when you should eat. You know what’s best for you.

  3. You know long I’ve been around reading the little details that you share with us Reggy… I remember when the guys you liked rode over on bicycles. So I’ve been following this particular saga from the beginning and I think it may be time to put this one ~ you know what.. forget the advice ~ what do I know anyway?
    You need a simple solution… you need a car.
    Always
    Greg

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