It’s the best way to describe exactly how I’ve been feeling these days. I’m all of a sudden no longer that close to my friends from University, I have no one significant to speak of, I’m not all that close to any of my old work friends, I’m not that close to any of my current work friends… and my family is just my family – I’ll always love them, but I just need to get away sometimes.
The last time that I had friends who I could call up to just ‘shoot the shit’ with, was before I moved to Canada. I ended up making a pretty critical mistake when we first moved here and focused on (what I thought was) love instead of trying to build friendships but what did I know? I had always had friends who had always been around when I was growing up, why should it be any different now that we’re in a new country? *DingDingDing* Because these aren’t people that you’ve grown up with and will be there for you no matter what!
I obviously took it for granted, having friends like that, and at the same time that I wish I hadn’t… I’m sort of glad I did because I’ve learned the value of having friends like that. More importantly, I’ve learned the value of not writing someone off simply because they did or do one thing that pisses you off sometimes. I’ve learnt to look past people’s quirks… and see the good.
But even still… as I’m leaving in a little over a month I sure wish I had people I could hang out with everyday and ‘make the most of…’ with. I guess that should at least be my family, but a part of me is being a real brat and insisting that it be my ‘friends’. How crazy is that?