This weekend… I realised how much my life has changed. I used to be so addicted to the internet, so much so that I never really went out and lived my life. But Ireland has taught me better. And the more I realise how much more I like who I am here in Ireland, the more I realise I miss my life back in Canada. More than anything I miss the people. I miss the simplicity of living with my parents (I never thought I would say that!). And I miss how easy my parents made my life. But, I’m not going home.
Right now, I’m learning. A lot. I’m in a Human Resources role, and it means having to change something about me I’m not even sure I can change: my honesty. It’s not that I have to lie to people when I’m in HR, but I can’t be as direct as I’m used to. I have to adopt to the Irish culture that sugar coats every request and hides unpleasantries in caring questions. I don’t mean that in a bad way… I just can’t be nice all the time. And it’s not that I’m upset because as soon as I am able to say whatever smart comment, or blunt answer I’ve got to say… I’m fine. Unfortunately, that means that the other person has to deal with the delivery of it all.
I’m also trying to do the same kind of thing with my housemates. I’m trying not to let the little things bug me… but it’s hard. I go about my business in this house and I try to consider other people. And I get annoyed when other people don’t do the same. Maybe too annoyed. Maybe I expect too much. Obviously, I haven’t really decided yet.
Anyway, I started seeing some real trouble this weekend because I did not want to leave his house after staying there 2 nights in a row and I didn’t want him to leave after we had come home to watch some TV. And I didn’t want him to leave because I didn’t want to have to sit in the TV room with my housemates. But I’m not sure if that’s because I knew they’d be watching some crap soap or because they just plain annoy me sometimes.
See, it really doesn’t help that I’m such a Type A personality… so in need to be in control. So, “It’s my way or the highway”. At least I’ve been able to downplay that in our relationship.