Special thoughts for a special lady on this, her special day

[Pardon the cheese in the title; there just had to be some].

Mum & Dad at Christmas 2012

My dearest Mother,

I think about how mean I was to you as a teenager and I’m filled with guilt. You never once made me feel like less of a human being, nor less of a daughter for acting out. You’ll say that it was your duty as a mother but others would say that it makes you an extraordinary mother.

Okay fine, I suppose I could have been worse – it’s not like I ever got arrested or overdosed on drugs but I wasn’t exactly easy to deal with. Being highly emotional is hard to deal with when you don’t know what emotions are yet. You always knew how to deal with me though, whether it was simply leaving me alone or trying to talk to me in your own indirect way; it was always exactly what I needed. Whether you knew that or not, I’m not sure.

I’ve often wondered how different our lives would be if I confided in you more. I still remember that time I experienced my first broken heart here in Canada and your hug was the only one that comforted me; that made me feel safe. I don’t recall if I said much about the pain I was feeling, but I don’t think it matters.

I like that we’re becoming friends now. I hope we can do more of it. There’s so much more I want to say but fear that should be left for a more intimate setting. I hope you enjoy your special day, because we enjoy having you in our lives and we want you to feel just how much we do magnified by a thousand suns.

Happy Birthday, Mum.

I love you always,


  1. There will be no asking who Q is[]

Happy Birthday my loves <3

Jackie and I were partners in crime at Victoria Park Secondary School way back when… when I look back on my favourite vacations she is always there. I have two: One when I went to visit her in LA and when I went to visit her in Holbox, Mexico. Jackie, you are my soul mate and I wouldn’t have it any other way (except maybe I wish we could be physically closer to each other for a larger chunk of each year but one day… right?)


Albert and I got tattoos together in 2005 and we haven’t looked back. I wasn’t sure whether you wanted to be displayed in public so I picked a photo that hid most of yer face 🙂 But know that I am not ashamed to call you my friend because you’re one of the best friends I could have ever asked for. I’m happy you and Barb are in my life.


When change hurts

It has been a journey to say the least. The last few months have been a wonderful whirlwind of ups, downs and important lessons and realizations. I think the one lesson that I didn’t expect to learn after all this is that despite being able to adapt to my surroundings extremely well -how much my bearings are affected if I don’t have a proper place to sleep.

For the last three months I have been sleeping on my Ikea love-seat because I couldn’t sleep on my bed1 until three nights ago. Depending on what way you look at it, you could say it cost me a lot but I don’t think placing blame on circumstance does me any good so it just is what it was: a learning experience. Heck, it didn’t kill me right?

30 years. As of some time in the late evening on November 7th, the cells and whatever spirit that make up this girl right here would have been alive for 30 years. I’ll admit there is a part of me that feels like a bit of a disappointment but then there’s another part of me that knows that my life is only just beginning so long as I allow myself the chance at said beginning.

Live each day as if it were your last. Someone great said that to me recently as we were walking the 6.5kms to my new home2 at 4am. By the way, don’t let the knowledge of this act taint your image of bohunkCA; he was the perfect jerk as always – and yes ladies, he was totally topless the whole way there 😉

I want to make an art out of living life, where I find joy in every little moment of every day – regardless of what is going on at the time. Growing up, I had never really paid much attention to the things that really made my heart soar. I knew the obvious things like music3, food, love, and sex… all those self-indulgent sort of things. But now I’m paying more attention to how happy it makes me to be around people like my family and closest friends4.

I know I have lot of work to do up ahead of me but I do think I am up to the task. It feels strange to say that I have never really felt this ready before but I guess I’m just done being afraid. I’m still in the process of getting my life back but I have no doubt that whatever is coming next is going to be amazing. It’s been amazing even when it should have been horrible so how could it not?!

I want to know though: did you love or hate turning 30?

  1. I really don’t want to say it, don’t make me say it: I had bed bugs[]
  2. it was so old school I couldn’t resist but agree to walk home with him[]
  3. specifically singing[]
  4. the ones who have stuck by me no matter what fucked up shit I’ve done – you know who you are[]

Just another reason to love Stella

Good ol’ Stella. I have been following along with them more closely since La Societe was on everyone’s beaks1 last year and after they threw the super awesome, super secret Underground party in the old Bay Subway station and I thought I was completely sold.

But their latest campaign that got people talking about how their Street Teams were giving away complimentary samples of their beer just made me love them even more… add to that how amazing anyone on the Stella Street Team2 and they’ve found themselves a fan for life in me.

And you know what happens when you love a brand right? They love you right back and I have some lovin’ to give right back to you, my darling readers, by way of TWO lovely Stella Artois Legere t-shirts designed by Toronto artist Dave Murray. You can see what it looks like in the pictures below… once the winner is picked, we’ll talk sizing.

Oh but that’s not all – I’ve ALSO got two pairs of passes to the Block Party on August 13th that I am sure will be super awesome3. Side note: I’m going on the assumption here that you know that #downtown won the race for hosting this block party and my id and I would like to think that I had something to do with it but my ego knows better.

TO QUALIFY we must be friends on facebook so add me up. Please include a message to tell me that you’re a reader of my blog and that you want to add me to enter the contest4. After you’ve done that, you’ll want to give the ol’ thumbs up to Stella Artois Legere’s Facebook page. because I will be checking and I’m sorry to say but you can’t win if you haven’t given ‘er.

After that? I’m afraid you’ll just have to watch my news feed on Facebook to see how you can actually win these things. What, and you thought this was going to be easy? Clearly you don’t know me at all5.


I’m going to leave you with some details about the block party:
DATE: Saturday, August 13, 2011
TIME: 8pm-midnight
LOCATION: 525 King Street West (West side of Starbucks, South side of King street)

(The party will be for 600 people, entrance is subject to capacity. Now, anyone of legal drinking age or older can RSVP to get on the guest list – all you have to do is go to Stella Artois Legere’s Facebook page. If you’ve already RSVP’d, no need to enter6 but feel free to anyway).

  1. so you know, on twitter[]
  2. the light taste of the beer helps too[]
  3. if I’m going to base my expectations on the secret subway party and the awesomeness of that event[]
  4. I’d explain why but I’m sure you understand[]
  5. I don’t blame you, I’m pretty introverted[]
  6. or even add me to Facebook right?[]