There is a running theme in my life these days. One that has me making an effort when I simply don’t want to. It takes discipline, and it takes humility and I am trying my best. I’ve never been good at either1 but they’re lessons I desperately need to learn if I’m ever going to succeed in getting the career I want. In this way, I’m a late bloomer because I should’ve learnt these lessons long before I finished University but it’s just not the way it has gone. I’m ok with it.

I think that making an effort in a professional capacity is easier. It’s easier than doing so in your personal life2, because when you’re making this effort – that you don’t want to make – for someone else, you feel forced; trapped; and in great danger of becoming resentful. It’s become important to remember the sacrifices that the other person has made for you and realize that they didn’t ‘put’ you in this position out of spite and so you shouldn’t feel any3.

I’m writing about this vaguely because I simply can’t write about it openly. A wise woman said to me this weekend that you have to write with the one person you don’t want reading what you’ve written in mind, so that is what I’m doing. I need to write about it, but I also know how they feel about when I write about things in the open – so as part of my effort making, I’m writing in the vague and hoping that it is enough of a compromise.

How often do you have to make an effort to do something even though you simply don’t want to?

  1. can you say spoiled? I can! []
  2. and therefore for someone else []
  3. spite []

responses to “Discipline” 4

  1. @Kelly: LOL 😉

    @Julius: LOL Glad to hear I’m not the only one forced to; but at the same time I hope you get out of it soon and get to do something you LOVE for a living!

    @April: I used to be the same, but I like to think there’s a certain amount of sacrifice that’s required in everyone’s life… for the greater good.. right? 🙂 Glad to hear you’re back blogging hehe.

  2. Hey Reggy. It’s me, April. I recently switched blogs cuz I have yet to pay my yearly bill for my site. LOL! So I’ve decided to do it for free over at blogger.

    To answer your question, I try very hard to not be in a position where I have to do something I don’t want to, because I can’t emotionally deal with being constrained by doing things I really don’t want to have to do.
    .-= April, the Nerd.´s last blog ..Paladin Pride =-.

  3. “How often do you have to make an effort to do something even though you simply don’t want to?”

    being an artist/designer who’s become a corporate slave, that question resonates in my head every time i sit in front of my computer. forced to follow brand guidelines, colour scheme, etc…i feel trapped in a little den of insanity. lack of creativity in my life makes me dull. T__T but thank god for flickr!
    .-= Julius´s last blog ..In Her Loving Memory =-.

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